Friday, April 11, 2008

I Will Endure

All of these Perceptions, all of these Ideas and all of these Experiments will be like sand through your fingers if you don’t put them into action. Real, direct, passionate and, most of all, constant action.
It is very common to encounter a Path and be very enthusiastic about it initially. That initial enthusiasm is what we would call a "DO", the first note in the Octave. The energy flows without effort, stemming from the discovery of a new treasure, a new way of doing things, a new hope of escape from the mechanical cage. Imbued with this initial enthusiasm you may feel yourself lifted by invisible hands and suddenly able to perform work that you have never been able to do before. Doors may open that have been previously closed and a realm of new possibilities will extend before your eyes. This is all true and not a mirage. These doors can open and the possibilities are there, but this initial enthusiasm, this sudden burst of free energy, is fleeting.
Soon you will encounter a sequence of obstacles that will get harder and harder. Some of these will come from the outside world encroaching on your private work space. But most of these obstacles will flower completely from within you, from the deeply ingrained programming of your biological machine desperately seeking to return to a complacent and comfortable sleeping state. This is true of every single Being that has ever embarked on this process. There is no easy way around these obstacles and it is better to face them squarely and be aware of their true nature.
Your mechanical perceptions will try to trick you. Your machine and the world around it will tell you that what you are doing makes no sense, that it has no real purpose, that it ultimately leads to no gain and to disaster, that you are a fool (and indeed you are), that you have stepped into a great mistake and the best thing you can do is step back into what the machines call "the real world".
The passing of time will rub away at your enthusiasm. Your mind will grow weary when results and intellectual revelations don’t come as quickly as they used to. Your intellect may start looking for other sources of surprise, your movement center may start needing a new way to move and dance, your emotional center will start to search for a new emotional fix… all of it to be expected as you move through the intervals of the Octave. As you encounter these intervals, you may become lost and disoriented. You may forget what you are doing and why you are doing it. In this disoriented state you will become like a ship in a storm and any port will do.
You may encounter a direct experience of the Eternal and be so shocked by the Nothingness that your machine will shrink away in fear, trying to find a safe place to rest and forget what it has seen. The reverberations of shock and awe may linger in your dreams and your daily imaginings, it may pull you away from your work and steer you to what it believes are safer pastures.
The programmed habits of your machine, which may have started to loosen, may come back with an unexpected force, determined to take over their lost inner kingdom. The physical, mental and emotional addictions that you thought were long forgotten, will stage a comeback of epic proportions, taking energy from the caves of darkness where your machine has hidden its most precious treasures. The urges and raw desire may be so overwhelming that you will make terrible mistakes, you will hurt your work and the work of others around you, you will have one emotional explosion after another in a devastating storm of mechanical vengeance.
All of these things will happen, in one way or another. The machine might initially think that the Work is for itself, for its vanity, for its glory, for its pleasure. But sooner or later it will realize its mistake and, when this happens, it will counterattack, with more force and passion than you can easily anticipate.
You live in a mostly mechanical reality. Your quest for Life is a quest that goes against the mechanical inertia of decades and even centuries. The odds are stacked against you. You can’t undertake this quest in a half hearted way. Every bit of true passion, love and energy that you can muster must go into your work. And above all, you must endure. You must find a way to persist through all the obstacles, through all the failings, through all the setbacks and catastrophes that will happen. You are embarking on a great Odyssey, a Voyage that will never be completed.
The Work has no beginning and it has no end.
When I step into the Work, I step into Endless Toil.
Through all the hardships, through all the heartbreaks and tribulations, through every obstacle that the mechanical world will violently throw at my face… I WILL ENDURE.

The Journal

You will begin to keep several journals. You will need three notebooks. One will be used for recording your dreams, the second is for journaling about your daily life, and the third is for keeping a record of these experiments. In each notebook you will date every entry including the year.
Keep the dream journal by your bed with a pen. As soon as you awaken, write everything you can remember from your dreams. If you can’t remember anything, date the page and write "I chose not to remember my dreams." When you do remember, be sure to keep track of details. If you dream of drinking a glass of lemonade in your grandmother’s kitchen, your journal should say precisely that, not something such as: "Dreamed of drinking." Those things which seem insignificant to us are often the most revealing aspects of the dream, so be as descriptive as possible in your account.
The impact of these experiments will be reflected by your dreams. The experiments presented to you in this text will act as magickal seeds. The best way to keep track of the development of these seeds is to monitor the dark soil of the subconscious. This attention to your dreams will help what is taking root in the subconscious to blossom forth within your ordinary consciousness. Do not, however, despair if the design of things does not become "concrete" in a way that satisfies your waking consciousness. Remember that not all plants are fruit bearing, and even without satisfying the hungry ego, they may be deserving of a chance at life.
In the daily journal keep a record of the days activities, the weather, your moods, thoughts, and any major events. Some days you may choose to be brief, and on others detailed, but write something every day.
The experiment journal will serve to keep track of the experiments you perform each day. Keep track of the date and time the experiment was conducted, how much time was spent, your mood before and after, and any thoughts or physical sensations associated with the experiment. In some experiments you will be asked to record particular details, this journal is where those details will be recorded.
Obtain these notebooks and write in your dream journal and daily journal every day for the next 12 days before moving on to the first experiment.
Maintain your sense of adventure and never give in entirely to the urge to "find a point" in either your dreams or the things you choose to write about in your daily record. "Finding a point" can feed a virulent form of "herbicide" that will ultimately ravage the garden these experiments strive to tend.
Every once in a while, look back at your notes. Look for the recurring cycles. Look for the spaces of awakening. Look for the gaps of sleep.
No matter what happens or what is not happening, keep on writing in your journals. Maintain them as the silver thread that keeps you attached to your Real Purpose.

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